This is King Kush.

I got him for free because Ted bought $15+ worth of assorted candy at some shop today (and apparently that warrants a free lion). He has taken up permanent residence on my shoulder, which would be fine if only he’d stop whispering such inappropriate things in my ear.

EDIT: Gave him a make-over.

So Captchas While Trying to Comment on a Youtube Video

Were clearly put in place to test you after making one comment too many. But not, as people often think, in an attempt to ensure the commenter is not a spambot, but in fact, to ensure the commenter is not too high/drunk/crickity-crunk to function. I must be one of those very commenters, because I just sat here trying to decode a Captcha for the better half of an hour, occasionally distracted from my mission by a text from my good friend [MT].

I’ve been spewing god only knows what sort of nonsense at her all night. She’s a trooper, though. I mean god. We met in Jr. High. Yeah, she’s a trooper. Anyway. Sometimes I reread old posts in our chatlog in an attempt to piece together how I managed to go from talking about Thumb-Woman’s Mio flavours of choice, to Tom Cruise’s exploding enthusiasm, to olfactory orgasms and what I now jokingly dub my canine dysphoria. To how seriously I take my other Tumblr. And then somehow back to:

Jaz X: Do eet do eet do ete
Jaz X: Ete
Jaz X: OH COLD BEER
Jaz X: BOOM DIGGITY DOG!!
Jaz X: Or whatever thumb-woman said.

But yeah, I  mean. Hey. I  haven’t written a post here in awhile. I’m kind of disappointed in me for it, because I’ve opened it up to more than just trip reports. To be just a place where I post any original text at all, just because I feel like it. Just because I need to write, and post, and not look back, and not regret. Not heavily edit it. Not delete it. Ever. Because god, I could just fucking cry thinking about all the great literature and journals I wrote in my younger years (great even in their probable shitiness), then tossed. Thinking, “No one would want to read this. I don’t even want to read this.” And here I am, so much older, wishing I could experience my past as it happened, if only for the span of a story or two. That would be -so- magical. So I sit here and mourn my old books, my old blogs, my old public and private journals. My old -art-! I sit here and mourn it and fail to create anything in its absence, leaving future me, once again, looking into my past and finding nothingness, emptiness, vague memories. It scares me to think of how hazy some of my favourite memories are.

So. Shut up, MysticButt. Stop groaning about how trite your experiences and thoughts and ideas are, how they smell of dead horse. Know that for whatever reason, you’re perfectly satisfied with the stories you’ve held in your heart for years, remaining only in your mind. Know that’s what you like about your stories and characters. That they’re so abstract. That writing them down makes them too concrete for your liking. Remember that, the true core of your yearning to write comes from a part of you that wants to express itself in whatever way it can. It doesn’t care to be something so refined as a published author. It cares for free speech and the ability to babble nonsense and shout, uncensored, “FUCK!” as many times as it DAMN well pleases and deviate entirely from the structure of a publishable book.

So. Shape up, MysticFUCK <3 and open up a text field and write. Just start writing, because you’ll end up with something and that’s better than nothing. Just fucking try it, because tonight I did just that, and voilà~! A pile of steaming stoner shit which should rightly make me feel like a jack ass for posting, but it’s the best thing I’ve written all year. It’s the -only- thing I’ve written all year, is why. Shed a tear for your lost followers, play a sad trombone solo. Play a funky saxophone solo, actually. You know the one with pelvic thrust g- oksighholdon

Jaz X: Quick I need the link to that saxophone guy
[MT’s Steam UN]: UH….
[MT’s Steam UN]: WHICH SAXOPHONE GUY?
Jaz X: lololol
Jaz X: The pelvic thrust guy
[MT’s Steam UN]: … WHICH PELVIC THRUST SAX GUY? I’m serious, there are like 5
[MT’s Steam UN]: that I know of
Jaz X: Oh hot damn, well ALL OF THEM obv., but mostly the one you showed me via a 10 hour long looping video on Youtube.
Jaz X: Or am I making that up.
[MT’s Steam UN]: OH ok hold on
[MT’s Steam UN]: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KHy7DGLTt8g

Play that for them. And just write for you when you want to and do nothing you don’t want to do. Aroo roo.

Alright I think that’s all I have to write. Ahhhyep.
“Yarp” : sure sign of an indescribable funk.
[Which kind of sounds cool and kind of is. Bye now!]